Babygirl

Early in my pregnancy, I saw an acupuncturist.  There was a meditation CD she had me listen to and in it, the narrator was describing how this baby was coming at the exact moment she was meant to.  And reminded me to remember every woman who came before who made way for her.  She said that my ancestors past whispered her name through the ages and already knew her.  It was a really powerful moment for me, and I believe it to be true.

I am 32 weeks along now.  My baby's c-section is scheduled for 39 weeks -- August 22.  So, if you can't do the math, that's seven short weeks from now.  But you mommas know that those seven weeks aren't so short, are they?  I'm back to napping daily, and I'm reminded that you finish this journey much like you start it.  It's a lot of work growing a baby.

But I am wildly greatful for this experience. When I was pregnant with Matthew, everything was so foreign.  He was my first, and everything seemed strange and unexpected.  Then with Jack, I was so sick.  For nine months.  I couldn't wait until my delivery date from the day I got pregnant.  But this time...this time, I've just been enjoying everything.  From week 14, when I started feeling better until now, I've loved this experience.  I am carrying her well.  My back hardly hurts.  Her kicks make me laugh, or tear up.  I am anxious to hold her in my arms, but not so anxious to give up my freedoms and my summer with the boys.  She can wait until term.

But like I said, I feel things starting to change.  She's measuring a couple weeks bigger than she should be, and I'm feeling that.  Her kicks are less pleasant.  My fuse is shorter (my apologies to the captain and my kids).  I still love it, and I know this is by design.  The last stretch is horrible so that women will do anything to get that baby out.  (I think we should campaign for a 36 week gestation!)  My goal was to share with you my joy before it turns to anything else.

My mom will tell me that she won't come until her birthday.  And she's right.  Because that's the perfect time...for all of us.  And when her time in utero is a distant memory, I will hold her in my arms and be grateful for the process...the time we've had, just the two of us.  And I will watch her carve her place in our lives and in our world and again thank God for the paths that led her to me.

May Photo Challenge: Water

I'm so far behind! I didn't even realize we were on Water when I took this photo this morning.

Filling my kids pool on our first 80+ degree day.

May Photo Challenge: Texture

May Photo Challenge - Sunflare

I'm digging back into my archives for this one.  These are my favorite sunflare photos of all.  My favorites are from vacation, which is no surprise because I have all that time to photograph so many things...I should have done this challenge in June!

May Photo Challenge: Beauty

I really wanted to photograph my mom for this topic, but that wasn't possible, unfortunately.  This is my neice, and I think she's beautiful.  I love the light in this photograph.

A Decade, A Lifetime

Ten years ago, on Mother's Day (which was May 12 in 2002), I met the captain for the first time.

I was waitressing at Doolittles in Plymouth; working a double shift that day and it was so busy!  Cory and his family came in for dinner.  Because his mom and I worked together at Polaris back then, I paid a little more attention to the table than I might have.  I remember that we were serving champagne and strawberries to the moms.

The very first thing my love ever said to me was, "I'll have a Captain Coke."  It was meant to be.  ;)

As I recall it, Cory left before the rest of his family.  I didn't think about it much until a couple days later when a mutual friend at work told me his mom was going to call and bug me for some info.  She did.  I remember she asked if I was single and I told her to give Cory my number; I'd do anything once.  I do not remember the date of our first date, but we went to dinner at Sunsets and then hung out at a beach near my house. 

I liked him right away, but if I'm being fair, my love life was pretty complicated then.  I was healing from a difficult long relationship I had only been out of for a couple months, and I had met a guy in New York that I planned on seeing in the beginning of June, when I went there for a motorcycle rally.  Cory told me to call him when I was in New York, but I told him not to be surprised if I didn't.  He was sure he'd never hear from me again.  He was wrong.

I went to New York, and the other guy never showed up.  Providence.  When I got home, it was a Sunday.  I called Cory's home phone and left a message.  He called me from his parents that afternoon, not knowing that I had called him first.  We must have made a decision to meet again.  Things moved pretty quickly from there:  I went with him for a fire department interview in Sioux Falls, SD in the beginning of July.  By the end of that month, we know it was a solid relationship, and were madly in love.

 We got engaged that December, and married the following May, one year from the first time we met.  We had both been in unsustainable relationships and we knew that this one was.  At the time we met, Cory was applying for full-time fire jobs all over the midwest.  He swears he knew he loved me when we were talking about the possibility of him getting a job elsewhere and I said, "I'm mobile." 

I knew I loved him early on.  He has always been so incredibly stable, and strong, and patient with me.  In the beginning, I was still healing from my past, and I had some wounds that he had to wait out.  And he never made me feel bad about it.  He was ten times the man I had always wanted, effortlessly. 

I have a thousand wonderful memories of this past decade.  He has supported me through three pregnancies, and my journey as a step-mom and a mother.  He supports me as a working mom.  And maybe most importantly and endearingly, he supports me as a woman.  He repects my ideals and my expression of them, and encourages me to be who I am.

So on this Mother's Day, a decade later, I want to thank the captain.  For giving me the chance to be a mom and for being my partner. I couldn't do it without him and I am forever grateful for that moment he ordered a drink from me.   Here's to many more, Cory.  I love you!

May Photo Challenge: Bold

You don't have to agree with his statements, but you have to agree that standing up for your convictions, even if it might cost you politically, and even if you know others are going to hate you for it, is BOLD.